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Don't Be a Good Patient. Be a Bad Patient
STORY HIGHLIGHTS
- Be respectful of your doctor, but don't assume that he or she is always right
- Your health depends on your comprehension of the problem, so ask a lot of questions
- Don't put your relationship with your doctor ahead of your health
(CNN) -- My mother, Sheila Schwartz, is a firecracker. As a lawyer, social worker, wife, mother of four and grandmother of 11, she's always on the go -- working, caring, loving life. About 10 years ago, when my mother was around 60, something suddenly changed. She began feeling tired, achy and dizzy, and her blood pressure was slightly high even though she was on blood pressure medication. Her internist tinkered with the dosage, but the blood pressure wouldn't budge.
The internist then told my mother her blood pressure would go down if she just stopped working so hard.
"He told me the high blood pressure and the other problems came from being so busy," she remembered. " 'Slow down,' he said, 'and you'll be OK.' "
This response sounded strange to me. My mother certainly worked hard -- and had done so happily -- but she'd worked hard her entire adult life, and until then she'd been just fine. Why all of a sudden would her long days cause her to feel ill?
My mother's condition continued to deteriorate. While vacationing in another city, she felt especially weak and went to a local doctor. He told her he thought she might have a problem with her adrenal glands, and when she returned home, she checked in with a nephrologist, who ran some tests. He found out she had an adrenal abnormality, which was wearing out her kidneys.
If my mom's internist had ordered a blood test, he most likely would have caught the problem, and it could have been treated easily with a simple surgical procedure. Since the problem was allowed to fester, she ended up needing a kidney transplant, which she received last year.
There are two lessons learned from my mother's experience. One, when a doctor tells you to just relax to get rid of real, physical symptoms, it's probably time to find a new doctor.
Second, it doesn't pay to be a "good" patient. My mother grew up in a time when doctors were authority figures not to be questioned and to be trusted 100 percent.
"That's what I was brought up to do," she said. "I was an empowered mother. I was an empowered social worker. I was an empowered student. I was not an empowered patient."
In this case, as in many others, it pays to be a "bad" patient. If my mother had pushed her doctor, asking him to re-think his diagnosis, she probably would have annoyed him, but it would have been worth it.
Remember these three golden rules of being a "bad" patient.
1. Ask lots of questions. If you don't understand something, ask for clarification, and if you still don't understand, ask again. The doctor or nurse might be visibly annoyed, but that shouldn't stop you. Remember, your health depends on your ability to comprehend what the doctor is telling you.
2. Don't worry whether your doctor likes you. If you hesitate to do anything that might upset the doctor, such as asking lots of questions, you're putting your health in jeopardy. While it's a natural inclination to want to be liked, your health comes first and your popularity second.
3. Remember that this is a business transaction. You're paying the doctor for a service; you're not in a popularity contest. Of course, you're respectful of the doctor, just as you're respectful to a waitress or your car mechanic, but you don't owe it to your doctor to be the perfect patient.
Find this article at:
http://www.cnn.com/2010/HEALTH/09/30/bad.patient.save.life/index.ht...
http://www.cnn.com/2010/HEALTH/09/30/bad.patient.save.life/index.ht...
Video Version
Views: 108
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Mike on
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I like this part especially:
1. Ask lots of questions. If you don't understand something, ask for clarification, and if you still don't understand, ask again. The doctor or nurse might be visibly annoyed, but that shouldn't stop you. Remember, your health depends on your ability to comprehend what the doctor is telling you.
2. Don't worry whether your doctor likes you. If you hesitate to do anything that might upset the doctor, such as asking lots of questions, you're putting your health in jeopardy. While it's a natural inclination to want to be liked, your health comes first and your popularity second.
3. Remember that this is a business transaction. You're paying the doctor for a service; you're not in a popularity contest. Of course, you're respectful of the doctor, just as you're respectful to a waitress or your car mechanic, but you don't owe it to your doctor to be the perfect patient.
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Permalink Reply by Kath Hope www.hope2Sleep.co.uk on
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Brilliant post, and something we should all take stock of! As good a GP as we have, they can be wrong! We have to take responsibility for our own bodies (which is why most of us are members of this great forum). I remember a sleep apnoea forum where there was a truck driver there who suspected he had sleep apnea, but his GP wasn't interested. He asked our visiting sleep physician what he should do. The advice was loud and clear..... CHANGE YOUR GP
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Permalink Reply by Rette Tyrrel on
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Also, if the physician is really out of line, file a complaint with Medicare, and/or your insurance company. I had an echo cardiogram. Before the test, the cardiologist walked in, told me his name, that he was 'supervising' the test, and walked out. When it was over, he walked in, said it was fine and walked out. Total maybe 30 seconds. I later found out that the test showed that I have ischemia. Since I had to be gone for several months, could not find a doctor to follow up for a period of time. Hate to know what not-fine is.
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I had palpitations, had consultation with heart specialist did some tests and gave me tablets.
Saw a second heart consultant and he said "have you been tested for OSA." Bingo
I have seen 3 of the top ear and ent specilist in the u.k. who have all said that using an a/pap cannot affect my hearing!
I now know how wrong they are!
I saw 3 haematologists trying to find out why I was anaemic and just gave me Iron tablets.
I have since been diagnosed as being low on folic acid and b12 and now know any one of these can make you anaemic.
Do not be afraid of asking for a second opinion.
And remember they are not always right!! Joe
Joe
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Permalink Reply by Henning on
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It is similar to the Internet. You can find all sorts of information here. Some doctors are opposed to this, and many patients cannot select in all this information.
But a lot of patients are well prepared for their encounter with their doctor, and more and more doctors believe it can be positive and give rise to a good conversation with their patients about their symptoms.
Personally I would opt out of the first type of doctors.
Henning
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Permalink Reply by Amy on
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I much prefer the patient who asks questions. I see them as the good patient. So I guess your perspective is what tells you who are the good patients.
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excellent advise. It always pays to do some research (e.g. on internet) about your condition first and prepare questions and then pay visit to the doctor.It will pay off!
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Having many DR's I get copies of all lab reports tests and med changes, make a list of what is going on (symptoms) then
make a list of questons .Make two copies one for the doc and one for me. bring a pen and take notes cause memory isnt that good .Always say thankyou and dont be affraid to get 2nd opinion if your gut tells you to.
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Permalink Reply by Steven Y. Park, MD on
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In general, I agree with the thrust of the article, which is to take responsibility for your health and be proactive. As a physician and sometimes as a patient, I do have a few comments, though:
1. Ask lots of questions. If you don't understand something, ask for clarification, and if you still don't understand, ask again. The doctor or nurse might be visibly annoyed, but that shouldn't stop you. Remember, your health depends on your ability to comprehend what the doctor is telling you.
Excellent idea. The patients that do their research are better informed, and in general, I find it helpful when making decisions together. However, sometimes it can go too far...I have some patients that are overly paranoid that their throat pain is cancer and are literally shaking after reading about all the worst case scenarios on the internet. Every patient has a different approach when it comes to interacting with their doctors. The challenge is in figuring out which approach to use that's most helpful for the patient. Just recently, I spent more than 30 minutes describing all the different options, pros and cons about his treatment options, and after a long pause, he just looked at me and said, Doc, just tell me what to do.
2. Don't worry whether your doctor likes you. If you hesitate to do anything that might upset the doctor, such as asking lots of questions, you're putting your health in jeopardy. While it's a natural inclination to want to be liked, your health comes first and your popularity second.
I agree. Doctors as well as patients must be open and honest with each other. You don't have to like each other.
3. Remember that this is a business transaction. You're paying the doctor for a service; you're not in a popularity contest. Of course, you're respectful of the doctor, just as you're respectful to a waitress or your car mechanic, but you don't owe it to your doctor to be the perfect patient.
This is something I can't agree with (the first part). Maybe I'm old fashioned (at 43), but I truly do believe in cultivating a healthy patient-physician relationship. It takes years to develop these skills, just like an artist or a lawyer. There's something beyond the tests, procedures or the exam. It's not a business transaction, it's a human to human interaction. Using this line of reasoning, even marriage can be viewed as a business transaction. Sadly, patients are beginning to see doctors and surgeons as mere technicians.
I recently overheard an otologist tell a story about an elderly man who was grateful that ear ear operation went well, and told him this: "Doc, you're great.....I can hear now. You went into my ear and cleaned me out. You're just like my plumber, except that you didn't charge me as much."
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