Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by sleepycarol on November 8, 2009 at 10:16pm

I feel it is important to tell our stories since others typically are going through the same thing.

I felt pretty isolated and tried to tell myself that everyone had to feel as tired and run down as I did. That heavy, impending sense of doom that was always present. For me, hubby recognized something was amiss when he would wake me up by shaking me and calling my name. He would tell me that I wasn't breathing. This went on for a few years, not every night but several times a month. I really thought that he was being a jerk and was doing it to irritate me. I started thinking maybe he was right when my 5 year old granddaughter would do the same thing. She would poke me and yell, "grandma breathe!!" She would frightened and tell me to stop that since it scared her.

Although I had complained of severe fatigue, etc. not one doctor ever mentioned having a sleep study. I had to bring the subject up to our family doctor. I am so glad that I insisted, othewise I am unsure where I would be today.

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Permalink Reply by sleepycarol on November 8, 2009 at 10:18pm

Rock, please keep us informed.

I hope that your test comes out fine, but there is a little part that hopes you join our special club of hoseheads!! I can just see you hosed up.

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Permalink Reply by Renee on November 8, 2009 at 11:05pm

Hello Susan ~

It’s interesting that I actually believe that too. As it is, I am a real proponent of therapy so I absolutely believe in how mental health is connected with physical health. And, although I have no institutional affiliation, I have gotten to practicing meditation techniques and I read and try to view things from an open, compassionate and, I suppose you could say, spiritual perspective. So, my make-up is actually the personification of the mind-body-spirit connection. But I guess because I wound up with these unseen health issues (tiredness, cognitive) that for so long no one else that I knew seemed to have and all the doctors I went to told me that there was nothing wrong with me – that I got tired of being seen as a malingerer – and then tired of BEING a malingerer – and so seems my mindset became that other than the physical problems, which can rightfully be viewed as legitimate, that the other issues are tiresome and not worthwhile to others and, ultimately, unacceptable of bona fide significance even on my own part.

But, now, when I read the postings that you and sleepycarol and bayoulady and others write here, it rejuvenates me and prompts me to consider that the issues that I find SOO very important for you and others on SG ought to be valid, consequential issues for me, too. So, I’ll keep reading the postings and working on that. Thanks again.

All the best,
Renee

Renee, thank you. I appreciate hearing that......

One of my closely-held beliefs is that mental health and physical health are one and the same thing. It's that mind-body-spirit connection you may have heard about. None of those 3 can be disconnected from the rest.....when one part is sick or in pain, the other two are as well....always........

Susan

Oh Susan,
It is sad to hear of how lost you must have felt through all this. And I find it so human and compassionate of you to share your vulnerable experiences here. Imparting this is very generous of you and I admire you for your courage in being willing to be so open and forthcoming about such distressing situations. I haven't felt as though my tiredness, cognitive deficits, etc. are of significant consequence to discuss or inconvenience others with but, as I read your clearly expressed counsel and support, I am thinking that these unseen problems are not just disappointments and frustrations to be relegated to the back burner but, rather, legitimate health issues that I should think about bringing more to the fore. And when you and others discuss the complications and stumbling blocks you encounter and are working through, I congratulate you all, and take strength in getting to think and feel that losses in energy and cognition, etc. should rightfully be considered as important health and human care issues. I would not have thought of presenting my concerns about issues, other than "strictly" medical issues to health care providers or on the SG forum - even while I find it very important to read postings about others. But reading your posting here and another that you posted recently is guiding me toward a new investigation into my sense of ability to consider expressing myself in a more open manner. So, thanks for nudging me in that direction.

My Best,
Renee

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Permalink Reply by Renee on November 8, 2009 at 11:10pm

Hello bayoulady ~

It is really heartening to read your posting that with your apnea diagnosis that you became hopeful - although sorry you’ve had to experience all this to begin with.

I have got to say that people with sleep apnea are an amazing and resilient bunch – to regain hope while still tired and exhausted – and then pursue a cumbersome, inconvenient, unpleasant daily (nightly) treatment that one can expect will take “?X?” amount of time to produce ‘hoped-for” results – and yet all the while one continues to be groggy and tired . . . Pretty darn fabulous folks . . . yes, indeed !

It is great to know that the fear of losing one’s mental capabilities (but now wanting to have it publicly out in the open) – can actually be relieved with PAP treatment ! ! ! I am so very pleased for you that you have found a great improvement in your memory and that you are less anxiety about your mental balance . . . so very pleased. I also like that if you have an off day that you allow yourself that it’s only for now and that you are getting better – nice way to talk to yourself.

Here's wishing you many more good full healthful days and nights ahead.

Best,
Renee


I wouldn't say that it's moody with me. It is more like an overwhelming feeling of being in a fog that I can't escape. I feel confused, and self conscious(everybody must know I'm not up to speed....)

I am not that moody, and I'd even say I'm a bit on the cheerful side. But over the past five years my mental fog was so scary, that I was afraid people would think I was getting Alzheimers(ms?). I had broken C6 in my neck, and it seems that that is when I noticed the fog...I have since read that spinal cord injuries can contribute to sleep apnea, though I am no expert on that. Frankly, I wondered myself if I had a brain injury or Alzheimers. So I put on a pretty good front I think. However, inside the gnawing anxiety over my muddling thoughts and poor short term memory (VERY POOR!)eventually brought me to the use of Paxil, an antidepressant, and later Zoloft. I took them off and on for the past few years until last winter, when I just quit it and slid on down the pole.

My cardiologist sent me to a sleep center in this spring.....April, I think. Indeed, I did have apnea. I was happy to know that with treatment I might even think more clearly. I was, and am, very hopeful.

I then started CPAP therapy. Gradually, I had days where I would think........."YESI do know where I put my lesson plans...I DO know where I put my stapler....I DO KNOW that we go on a field trip Friday...Whew!"

Since then, I have seen a great improvement in my memory, and with that less anxiety about my own mental balance. When I have a few nights in a row where I'm not sleeping well because of leaks, rain out, etc. The next day or so, I can tell I'm getting anxious. I just tell myself," It will get better. " I AM DETERMINED TO ADJUST, ADAPT, AND ACCEPT.

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Permalink Reply by RockRpsgt on November 8, 2009 at 11:12pm

The test is a formality. i taught my wife the warning signs. She says i have it. It is the severity that the test will tell me about. My wife says my snoring has increased 10 fold in the last 2 months. i have been making little mistakes or been even more moody than I already am. I have the Crapnea.

sleepycarol said:

Rock, please keep us informed.

I hope that your test comes out fine, but there is a little part that hopes you join our special club of hoseheads!! I can just see you hosed up.

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Permalink Reply by BeeAsleep on November 8, 2009 at 11:21pm

Crapnea....LOL!

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Permalink Reply by Renee on November 8, 2009 at 11:32pm

Hello Carol ~

As you know by now, I couldn’t agree with you more how important and valuable, and generous, I think it is that you share your stories. And it is so endearing to read of how your husband and granddaughter were so scared and trying so hard to save your life – and more than likely they actually did ! Imagine ! that you and your family had to work so hard – absolutely, positively, incredible proof of a patient’s need to take responsibility for their own health care – no matter how many doctors they have to continue to seek out to get past those who won’t look sufficiently to find the root cause of sleep apnea or any other health condition. Thank goodness for your wonderful family and your tenacious spirit and stick-to-it-tiveness. Bravo for you – and then some ! ! !

Best,
Renee

sleepycarol

I feel it is important to tell our stories since others typically are going through the same thing.

I felt pretty isolated and tried to tell myself that everyone had to feel as tired and run down as I did. That heavy, impending sense of doom that was always present. For me, hubby recognized something was amiss when he would wake me up by shaking me and calling my name. He would tell me that I wasn't breathing. This went on for a few years, not every night but several times a month. I really thought that he was being a jerk and was doing it to irritate me. I started thinking maybe he was right when my 5 year old granddaughter would do the same thing. She would poke me and yell, "grandma breathe!!" She would frightened and tell me to stop that since it scared her.

Although I had complained of severe fatigue, etc. not one doctor ever mentioned having a sleep study. I had to bring the subject up to our family doctor. I am so glad that I insisted, othewise I am unsure where I would be today.

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Permalink Reply by susan mccord on November 8, 2009 at 11:37pm

Ditto this for myself, Carol......

sleepycarol said:

I feel it is important to tell our stories since others typically are going through the same thing.

I felt pretty isolated and tried to tell myself that everyone had to feel as tired and run down as I did. That heavy, impending sense of doom that was always present. For me, hubby recognized something was amiss when he would wake me up by shaking me and calling my name. He would tell me that I wasn't breathing. This went on for a few years, not every night but several times a month. I really thought that he was being a jerk and was doing it to irritate me. I started thinking maybe he was right when my 5 year old granddaughter would do the same thing. She would poke me and yell, "grandma breathe!!" She would frightened and tell me to stop that since it scared her.

Although I had complained of severe fatigue, etc. not one doctor ever mentioned having a sleep study. I had to bring the subject up to our family doctor. I am so glad that I insisted, othewise I am unsure where I would be today.

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Permalink Reply by susan mccord on November 8, 2009 at 11:38pm

LMAO, Bee!!! I love that!.........

McCord

BeeAsleep said:

Crapnea....LOL!

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Permalink Reply by Renee on November 8, 2009 at 11:44pm

Hello Carol ~

First off, I don’t believe the part about you being a shrew – that said . . .

It is flabbergasting to me as I read the postings and am finding that the extreme tiredness and fatigue and loss of ability to be inclined to plan anything, to do anything, to be effectual, productive, to contribute, volunteer, even to just read more – or read at all – all of these things that I have gotten so down on myself about because I couldn’t find enough justification for my malaise – Hey – could really be imposed by the sleep apnea ! In reading your postings along with Susan’s and others – I am now starting to get a good “kick-upside-the-head” – and not one that I mind at all.

Thanks so much for writing. And I am very glad to know that you are you are on the upswing.

My Best,
Renee

I think that lack of sleep certainly affected my moods and depression. I would snap at those closest to me, and watch out for those that weren't close. I turned into a real shrew.

Fatigue can affect so many aspects of our lifes. We are in the walking zombie stage, exactly where I was, nothing seems to matter. My outlook was bleak and the littlest things would set me off.

I was diagnosed in August of 2007. I started therapy on August 31, 2007. It took my body a long time to adjust to good sleep, as I had been without it for so long I had forgotten what it felt like to be rested.

I am calmer now, feel better over all, have a brighter outlook on things, and those around me notice that the little things don't bother me as much.

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Permalink Reply by Renee on November 9, 2009 at 12:17am

Hello Rock ~

You always contribute so much on SG on so many varied topics – and that’s even before you have been diagnosed with sleep apnea – some great guy you are ! Gotta’ say I’m sorry you probably have “crapnea” but you seem to be heading into your test full steam ahead.

But, I’m wondering, with all the great support you give all the time on SG, how come you didn’t give a head’s up about your test ‘til someone innocently asked if you have sleep apnea? Didn’t you think the website could handle all the responses that would come your way once word was out about your test? Well, Mike had better look out on Friday when everybody bombards the site to find out about how you tossed and turned on Thursday . . . how much sleep did you get ?. . . did you actually get ANY sleep ? . . . how long before REM ? . . . how much REM ? . . . how many masks did you have to try ? . . . did the leaks drive you crazy ? . . . and you know I could go on and on – but let’s wait for Friday and we can all read together.

For now - wishing you an untangled, leakfree, quick-to-sleep, good quality REM sleep on Thursday !

Best,
Renee

Rock Hinkle
I believe I do. We will find out this week as i am having a study done. I would say that a shift worker might see as much sleep deprivation as someone with apnea.

Jan said:
But you don't have sleep apnea, do you?

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Permalink Reply by Andy on November 9, 2009 at 12:44am

Hi All,

Interesting discussion. I'm reading about everyone's symptoms, and seeing many of my own. So I guess that here, I'm normal...

For the last few years I've been losing my short-term memory. I went to the doctor truly thinking I had early Alzheimers. I couldn't remember things literally from one minute to the next. I'd dial the phone, and while it was ringing, forget who I was calling.

I was reading a lot, but remembering virtually nothing. I have always been able to read a technical book (I'm always studying some computer programming language or technique) and retain it in detail. Earlier this year, I was unable to een understand what I was reading, much less retain it.

I was also very depressed, and woke up every morning feeling an adrenaline rush.

I was also very tired, to the point where I was just as tired in the morning as I was when I went to bed.

I had no interest in anything, no motivation, couldn't sit through a movie or TV Show without falling asleep.

I was exhausted throughout the day, and had to take one or two naps to get through.

I slept only 3 or 4 hours per night (went to bed around 2 or 3am) and the uality of sleep was low. I hadn't had many dreams in years.

I went to my GP, who said I probably had depression, so I went to a psychiatrist, who diagnosed me with depression, and put me on depression meds. That took away the morning adrenaline rush, but did nothing for my mood or sleep.

After another year of this, I went back to the GP, who suggested a sleep study. It took 9 months to get to the study (long wait times for doctor and center), and was finally diagnosed with OSA.

I've had my CPAP for three weeks, and it's been the best three weeks I've had in years.

I now sleep 8-9 hours per night, wake up refreshed, and enjoy nightly dreams. Except for the one with the monsters the other night...

I am lucky and thankful to have been diagnosed, and thrilled to be on CPAP and sleeping again.

My "worst" night on CPAP was 4.5 hours, but every other night has been 100% CPAP assisted.

I'm not as crabby as before, am now much more motivated, and do not fall asleep around 3pm every day.

In fact, today I went to the park with the kids and our dog and played soccer. I ran around (YES! ME! I ACTUALLY RAN!) for a little over an hour. No problem!

Well, I mean not continuously for an hour, but I did run around. As compared to pre-CPAP, where I would have pushed the kids out of the car, locked the doors, and had a nap while they played.

My wife today said that my skin looked better, more "pink", and that my eyes were very clear. She said I looked 10 years younger!

I certainly feel it.

So, I now have my CPAP, and life is good!

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